What about a ninja SEAL?

How about that, Mr. “Head of US Joint Special Ops”?

And now you know what kind of news it takes to get me blogging these days.

About wormme

I've accepted that all of you are socially superior to me. But no pretending that any of you are rational.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to What about a ninja SEAL?

  1. Edohiguma says:

    I already went at that in 2 different places. Third time’s a charm!

    Are SEALs the better swimmers? Doubtful. Samurai were trained to swim even with armor. That even has somewhat of a revival these days. There are clubs where you can learn this actually, with armor and all. But yes, samurai could swim in armor and all ninja in history were samurai, thus ninja may well be the better swimmers.

    I will dismiss the argument of SEALs using guns, because it’s laughable. Guns were massively in use in feudal Japan, especially in the Sengoku period and there specifically from the 1540s onward. For a samurai in regards to honors running a successful musket unit could only be topped by taking the head of an opponent in single combat. The arrival of European muskets in Japan revolutionized warfare. they had access to Chinese muskets, but they were inferior to the European arquebus. We could go so far and even say that we can catch a glimpse of very early modern trench warfare as early as 1575, at the battle of Nagashino, where the folly of attacking a fortified position defended with firearms was shown the first time in history. Japanese arquebus units were even superior to what European armies fielded long after the wars in Japan had ended simply because they didn’t use support sticks. They were significantly more mobile than their European counterparts.

    The Japanese employed even snipers. Oda Nobunaga was shot at several times. Takeda Shingen supposedly was injured by a sniper and later died from this wound. And at Sekigahara the fleeing western army deployed rearguard units that contained snipers to stop the eastern army from completely sweeping them. Ii Naomasa was shot by one of them and died some years later from complications stemming from this wound.

    As for explosives. The only explosives ninja had access to was black powder just like everybody else in that time period.

    Are ninja more silent? That depends on their mission.

    But let’s just be clear about one thing. Ninja never wore black monkey suits and they never sneaked about in shadows. The most historically accurate portrayal of ninja doing their job can be found in Kurosawa’s Kagemusha. No black suits, no straight swords, no sneaking about.

    Plus, silence was countered in the living areas of mansions and castles by installing so called nightingale floors. The floorboards are constructed in a way that, the moment you step on them, they will make a noise.

    On the good side the admiral didn’t go Stephen Hayes on the kid. You never go Stephen Hayes, not even when you’re brain damaged.

    Just like some SEAL missions there were ninja missions that also failed. During the Shimabara Rebellion Tokugawa ninja failed to infiltrate the rebel camp because they couldn’t reproduce the local dialect.

    Most importantly:

    There are no ninja anymore. As I said every ninja known in history was a samurai. Some even held very high ranks, like Hattori Hanzo and Yagyu Juubei. They were both hatamoto to the Tokugawa, which means that they were among the most trusted retainers. And it makes sense. If you’re a feudal lord, you have your specialists for everything. You have an officer for cavalry, one for infantry, one for spears, one for sieges, one for bows, one for muskets, one even for heraldry (Japanese heraldry doesn’t work the same way as in Europe) and one for gathering intelligence. Especially the last one has to be someone you can trust. Plus, there was only one social class that had time to study warfare and that was the samurai.

    There were no hidden mountain villages where commoners would learn mystical ninja arts. Commoners were usually too busy working and paying taxes for such shenanigans. There were only trained professionals who served a feudal lord.

    In the early 1870s the samurai as a social class were abolished with two laws by the young Meiji government. The sword abolishment act (which prohibited carrying swords in public except for members of the military and police) and the class abolishment act. What was left was a small nobility, coming from the 270-odd daimyo families and the imperial court (the same nobility was also abolished post-WW2 and the imperial family was reduced to its core, leading to several branches about to become extinct -due to the outdated succession law). Everybody else was streamlined into modern Japan’s new society.

  2. wdydfae says:

    The way you set this up, I thought you were actually going to show an animal clip at the link.

    Nice historical review, Edo.

    • wormme says:

      OMG, you are vastly too kind. To me, I mean. Not to Edo.

      • wdydfae says:

        Seriously, I thought I was going to see a clip of a Sea World show where a seal tosses ninja stars from its back flippers, or something like that.

        • Edohiguma says:

          I would pay to see that.

          • wdydfae says:

            Best I can do for ninja seals.

            Look, I’m not going to pretend I can compete with Worme on animal vids.

          • Edohiguma says:

            Singapore! Awesome place. Never had time to visit the zoo. Just like in Hong Kong. *eyeshift*

          • wdydfae says:

            Singapore Zoo was so cool! Unlike any I’ve seen. Don’t know about now, but in the 90s wdydfae family members could ride on an elephant for a dollar (!), and a camel for a dollar, too. In addition to the seal show, they had an ape show and a bird show that were huge fun. A lot of animals are walking around (like Orangutang walking hand in hand with a zookeeper) to get them over the restless, caged up feeling. They have a night safari too but I didn’t have a chance to go. Agreed that Singapore is a great place, although you probably saw more of it than I, me being on a fairly typical package tourist run.

          • Edohiguma says:

            Just like Hong Kong I saw mainly the bars. It was just a short trip, but historically most interesting. I find the way they run the city possibly one of the most genius ways ever. Just take their housing projects. Most people there live in public housing projects, but unlike in the US or even the EU, where they build it, waste a ton of money and then have no clue how to prevent these projects from turning sour, in Singapore… they plan this stuff down to the smallest detail.

            They actually THINK! OMG!

            Btw, best thing you can do in Hong Kong?

            Drink, run out into the streets and yell, on top of your lungs….

            Baruk Khazâd! Khazâd ai-mênu!

            Oh yeah!

          • wdydfae says:

            Hey Edo, did you get a chance to see
            1) Hanzawa Naoki
            2) Amachan
            3) Woman

          • Edohiguma says:

            I’m behind a few weeks on Amachan (comes with the territory of torrents). Though, I have to say, it was very refreshing. That was actually an asadora that didn’t bore the crap out of me after 2 weeks! Fresh young actress, un-burned, with lots of spirit. It was a good combo.

            Hanzawa Naoki was awesome. Then again, one of my favorite actors in the lead (they could have done without Ueto though and put a real actress there).

            Woman was very good.

            The biggest disappointment this year in regards to dorama is clearly Yae no Sakura. I had really high hopes, but they were already crushed before filming began with giving Nakano Takeko to, what’s her name, Kuroki Meisa. That and 48-odd episodes with that theme? Good gods, who had that idea? What are you going to do with the main plot after the siege of Aizu-Wakamatsu? There is literally nothing happening.

            I stopped watching after, I think episode 20-something. Then I saw the ratings… Close to following Tairo no Kiyomori down the under 10% abyss.

            It would have been awesome for those 6-12 episodes Sunday jidaigeki NHK runs, like Shinsengumi Keppuroku (2011) or Tsukahara Bokuden (which also had Sakai). But yeah, go figure NHK will mess it up.

            Seems the asadora is going through somewhat of a revival. The taiga? NHK needs something really awesome to pull this cart out of the dirt.

            I’m looking forward to Gochisousan. Friend of mine’s in it.

          • wdydfae says:

            I’m ashamed to say I never watch the historical stuff all the way through. The closest I get is the old Mitokomon show reruns (70s? 80s?).

            Well, you confirmed my evaluations of the three dramas. Amachan builds up real good. I love the upbeat approach and the funny, self-referential vibe.

            Speaking of Hanzawa Naoki, do we dare show Worme pictures of Dan Mitsu? Not totally my type but I can definitely see the appeal. (It’s damn hard to find a SFW one.)

            What was that you yelled? It sounded like the old Hebrew saying grace before dinner thing: Baruch Atah Adonai, Eloheinu Melech Ha’Olam (Blessed art Thou O Lord King of the Universe).

          • Edohiguma says:

            Yes we dare! And yes we can!

            I saw she even threw a pitch once in a swim suit. But I agree, not really my type either. She’s pretty, sure, but I don’t consider her that attractive.

            The appeal is obvious. After all…

            In Boobs We Trust.

            I have to remove nerd points from you for not knowing the battle cry of the Tolkien dwarves.

          • wdydfae says:

            Agreed. Dan Mitsu’s got some serious bootay happening, too.

            OK, Busted. I think I got the requisite love for Tolkein with that important exception about the linguistics of Middle Earth. Also, my eyes glaze over when anyone in Tolkein starts singing.

          • Edohiguma says:


            Don’t make me Gibbs-slap you.

          • wdydfae says:

            You know what they call that now? Power hara!

            Here is Dan Mitsu’s pitch:

          • Edohiguma says:

            School uniform > swimsuit

            The really sad part is that she, just like most idols, pitches better than Obama.

          • wdydfae says:

            Have you seen Sadako’s first pitch?

            This is going to sound really weird, but Sadako is more my type than Dan Mitsu.

          • Edohiguma says:

            Depends on the actress. Nakama Yukie, back then, was a very gorgeous Sadako.

            Or it means you like to live very dangerously.

          • wdydfae says:

            It works for me. And it sounds a whole lot better than “I’m attracted to women with supernaturally malevolent intent who crawl into the physical realm with the express purpose of destroying and consuming my soul.”

          • Edohiguma says:

            Not just your soul. When you read all three novels it’s pretty clear that Sadako is after the whole world.

            Proving again, you don’t piss off Japanese women.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s