About the long absence…

…a bunch of factors are involved:  health, distractions, laziness, football bowl season.  But the main reason is probably my ever-growing disgust with our “culture” and its self-proclaimed mavens.  Watching society’s mortification and making quips about the rot briefly lost its appeal.

Of course you’ll glance back at the previous post and say, “And this is your return piece?  Really?”  Hey, your host is rusty and had other things on his mind.  See, earlier this week I met with the specialists who monitored me during my de Sade sleepover.

I have “moderate” OSA, obstructive sleep apnea.  It’s moderate overall, but “severe” apnea is 30+ events per hour and during REM sleep I had 42.  Good thing REM sleep isn’t important, right?  Apparently there’s only two things that can help:  transnasal insufflation, or surgery.

Surgery removes everything that might be blocking airflow, which apparently is the tonsils, adenoid, uvula, volvo, soft palate, appendices, liver, and fava beans.  I wish the nurse practitioneer hadn’t licked her lips at those last two.

Oh, there’s also no guarantee that surgery will work.  OTOH…transnasal insufflation?  Ewww.  Every single night for the rest of my life??  You thought I was crazy when I dared a murderous felon to come kill me.  Now you know better.

Maybe it won’t be as bad I imagine, trying to sleep with something clinging to my face.  There’s a choice between two different types of CPAP mask.  There’s this one…


…and then there’s the other.


And now you know what’s been on my mind lately:  deciding what’s going to be on my face later.

About wormme

I've accepted that all of you are socially superior to me. But no pretending that any of you are rational.
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11 Responses to About the long absence…

  1. Billy says:

    My Dad had some sort of nasal surgery to help him sleep better; said it was the most painful thing he ever went through. And I guess it didn’t help, as he now uses a breathing mask/machine when he sleeps. Sounds like the same ordeal. So sorry to hear of your condition. Hope you find some relief.

    • wormme says:

      Thank you. Yes, the nurse said the surgery would be very, very painful.

      • Yeah my step father in law got stuff removed several years ago, I’m not sure if it was all you listed but definitely the uvula. He has expressed regret at that procedure, and uses the CPAP now. I can get more details about it if you wish. Maybe the mask will be a great white noise kind of thing that actually helps you sleep . . . me always wishful thinking you know.

        I had never heard of that Wurtzel lady, but had already been concocting a post about a few “childless is best” articles I had run into, and then added her in at the last minute. Who knew; apparently people like to talk about her!

        Happy new years to you and your lot!

  2. Xpat says:

    I’m sorry to hear about this.

    I know one guy, maybe two, who had that surgery, or something like it, and it worked out.

    Given the risk that surgery might not do it, shouldn’t you try the mask solution first, and only go for the surgery option later, if you can’t get used to the contraption?

    BTW, the District 9 aliens have an interesting nasal set up. Instead of Bane vs. alien on face, it’s a Bane alien face!

    • wormme says:

      Didn’t think about them, and totally forgot about the Predator mask too. I’m definitely slipping.

      And of course I’m opting for the mask over surgery. Some people absolutely can’t adjust, but I’ve spent a few thousand work hours in full-face respirators already. This CPAP device is probably even less comfortable, but probably tolerable. Eventually.

  3. Mycroft says:

    I use the nasal pillows and find them much better than the masks – sort of like a snorkel for you nose.

  4. blindshooter says:

    Tried CPAP, three different style masks and three different pillows with no success. I learned just how much I like sleeping on my stomach. The dominatrix that administered both studies would not let me roll over so I couldn’t sleep at all until they drugged me to submission on my back. Still think my sleep problems were due to a mild drug interaction causing slight swelling of my upper airways. Got rid of the drugs and the CPAP now I sleep just fine. I hope your situation improves, whatever it takes, no sleep absolutely sucks.

  5. Xpat says:

    Hey, NooneOfAnyImport got linked by Insty! But I didn’t know the article or author she was writing about.

    • wormme says:

      Yeah, saw that. I’m familiar with Liz Wurtzel’s reputation but haven’t read any of her books. And could hardly bear to read a quarter of that essay, bless her little heart.

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