wormme loves chiaki

The best part of edohiguma’s epic rant against Hunger Games?  Learning that Chiaki’s performance in Kill Bill was..her worst?  OMG!!  I must learn Japanese! 

Oh, wait.  Her imdb page says she’s learning English and wants to do more American films.  Yes.  Yeeeessssssss, so my little Amaterasu avatar is also a cunning linguist (sorry). 

Come to America, Chiaki!  Putting gross Hollywood actresses out of business will be icing on the cake.  I beg of you, Ms. Kuriyama!  Is my begging satisfactory?    

She’s utterly magnetic as GoGo Yubari and that’s her worst dang performance?  I should probably avoid her entirely.  Yes.  Yes, that would be wise, given my OCD tendencies.  I would be a really, really creepy stalker.

But…if, say, I did sample her Japanese acting…where should I start?  Wait, cancel that!  I need to think about her less, not more.  Those grapes are probably sour, anyway.  I bet she hates dogs–

–damn it!  But no doubt she’s a spoiled, humorless–

–oh good grief!  I give up.  She’s too lovable.  But I think what makes her unforgettable is how her ravishing beauty can be so disquieting.  Even sinister.  

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About wormme

I've accepted that all of you are socially superior to me. But no pretending that any of you are rational.
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3 Responses to wormme loves chiaki

  1. Edohiguma says:

    I’ve been a HUGE fan for many years. I have all her movies, tv series, the one stage play, CDs, everything.

    I disliked Go Go because she had like 3 lines or so and was really only in for playing a certain stereotype. You have to consider that QT had originally two Yubaris in mind. Go Go, in the beginning, had a sister, Yuki, who was supposed to be played by Shibasaki Kou. QT wanted them both because of Battle Royale, but Kou didn’t even consider it and simply declined, most likely to avoid such stereotyping (and her success proves her right.) Chiaki has been moving away from this as well in recent years.

    The imdb page is totally out of date with her personal info. She won’t be doing any American stuff anytime soon, if at all, given how busy she is at the moment (and her second adventure into Hollywood was horse manure anyway, “Into the sun” isn’t a movie, it’s a ditch for pig feces, but then again, it’s a Steven Seagal movie, so what else to expect.) If anything, her performances in things like Hagetaka, Ashita no Kita Yoshio or Tsukahara Bokuden (some doramas), or Scrap Heaven, Kagen no Tsuki or GS Wonderland (some movies) totally pushed her forward in popularity, leading to a well established career and a lot of work as it is (she just landed a new commercial deal.)

    And when the only possibility is ending in a “production” like that 47 Ronin movie Keanu Reaves has been “producing”, then I’d rather not see her in America at all. It’s a waste of talent. Kou is in that one, sadly, and it will be a clusterf*ck like Last Samurai and Memoires of a Geisha. How do I know that already? Keanu’s character is a half-English samurai from Ako province, which doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. It’s historically 100% impossible. Oh, William Adams? William Adams is the only foreigner ever to be made samurai (there is some evidence for another one, a black guy actually, but it’s not much.) And he was hatamoto to the Tokugawa. There is no way some provincial lord would manage to do that. Plus, by the time Keanu’s character would be born, the Dutch were in charge of the trade. I could live with a half-Dutch, even though that would also indicate zero knowledge of Edo period society and politics (it would mean the foreigner could travel around freely in the country, which didn’t happen in the 17th century, would have contact to samurai women, which was impossible, and would actually ending up marrying one, which would never sit well with the central government and other samurai.) But anyway. There you have it. Funny how Japanese productions, like the big Taiga dramas, get the details straight (down to the correct number of stars on the US flag in a certain era.) I’m expecting some typical white western male stereotyping of “oriental” women, and the old fairy tale that the 47 attacked Kira over honor. Though, I doubt it’ll be as bad as Last Samurai. You can’t top the utter stupidity that was “We’re samurai, we don’t use guns.” Well, ok, you can. You can by making a movie based on Arthur Golden’s ridiculously badly written and stupid book. But it can’t get any worse than that.

    Anyway, back to Chiaki.

    Plus an active singing career. The debut song was pretty lame. Her second song, Kanousei Girl, however, that thing was good. Co-production with Hotei.

    Third song, Cold Finger Girl, was also pretty good, playing into her early action roles.

    She’s clearly moved away from the Chigusa/Yubari stuff and has turned into a pretty decent all around actress. She’s still doing it occasionally as seen recently in Himitsu Chouhouin Erika (which, for a midnight drama, had quite decent ratings, and it was interesting seeing her married and with a kid, she did pretty good) or Naniwa no Hana (liked that one a lot, despite the fight scenes being utterly awful, but Chiaki finally in a jidaigeki, in Edo period outfit, oh yes please!), but overall she’s become a lot more versatile, doing a lot of comedy as well.

    I really enjoyed her in Rebound. The problem was that the series was utterly killed by Aibu Saki’s utterly annoying lead character. I enjoyed her a lot in Atami no Sosakan, which was just silly and weird (basically a warped Japanese X-Files and I have to say I want more Chiaki with Joe Odagiri, they make a good team.) It’s kind of funny watching her now in Carnation and, honestly, she’s really the only reason I’m watching that one.

    Movie-wise, Scrap Heaven, Kagen no Tsuki, Kisarazu Cat’s Eyes and GS Wonderland are among my favorites. Youkai Daisensou is generally not taking anything seriously, but some good fun. Kamogawa Horumo is one of my personal favorites, simply because of how they decked her out for. EXTE is not scary, but if you ignore the utter sillyness in it, it’s actually funny. Plus Osugi Ren singing about hair is just too amusing.

    Avoid Azumi 2. The movie is just awful. The first part was already unimpressive and really just lived from Joe Odagiri playing the bad guy. The second is just awful. And Chiaki’s character gets shafted it’s not even remotely funny.

    • Edohiguma says:

      Also, list in yo face: http://wiki.d-addicts.com/Kuriyama_Chiaki

      Plus, let me add I absolutely love her nose. It’s huge, yes, but it fits perfectly into her face. I absolutely love her for never having gotten a nose job. And my CK folder has roughly 6,000 photos in it. The only bigger one is the one of “the one”.

      She’s also a total nerdling, and a gamer. Ok, just console, because that’s bigger in Japan than PC gaming, but it counts. She was actually in a game recently… And I forgot the name of it… Some yakuza thing with zombies. Found it. Yakuza: Dead Souls ((龍が如く OF THE END). She played a GSDF character (not the first time, did so in Kisarazu, and looks fantastic in uniform) and actually got a first-hand-impression of the game. They filmed her playing it and it can only be summed up under “adorable nerdling”.

      http://www.playlipse.fr/download-video-ps3-yakuza-of-the-end-chiaki-kuriyama_4589.html
      Could only find it there. It was on youtube at one point, but I can’t find it anymore.

      Also will be in the SPEC movie

      And a few more trailers and stuff in your face:


      I really love this commercial. I have a buttload of photos around from it. The kimono… wow. Just wow.

      Also, not Chiaki related, but with two other very good actresses (one of them is absolutely amazing): Hana & Alice. Love the movie. It has one of the most beautifully filmed scenes ever, featuring Aoi Yu:

      Aoi Yu was co-starring it with Suzuki Anne who has turned into an absolutely explosive stage actress.

  2. Xpat says:

    I feel so ****ing old. I haven’t been following any of this stuff! And I only have a very, very faint twinge of uneasiness that I should have been.

    There are so many more important things to do! Like chasing down 1970s funk fusion tracks:

    But why does Chiaki get all this effusive adoration from Worme, and GSB only gets a picture of a passed out skwirrrrrrrrl clutching a bottle of Pilsner?

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