I can’t tell the difference between spam and free verse.

Just waded through a backlog of comments, which were mostly, of course, digital spam.

But there was one, which I’m about to approve, which really bugged me.  It is:

I have a hose barb that screws onto the pipe my shower goes on. I also have about 8 ft of 3/8″ plastic tubing and a food-grade five-gallon bucket.

When I have large chunks of meat to defrost, into the bucket it goes, with the hose outlet at the bottom of the bucket. Turn the water on at the minimum trickle.

Three to five hours later, even a deep frozen 18 pound turkey is thawed, and has had minimum time to culture salmonella.

Small lumps, like steaks, pork chops, or chicken parts, go in a big glass casserole or pot for an hour.

I’m almost certain that comment is a human being responding to my turkey posts.  If so, it is extraordinary in its terseness and informativeness.  A masterpiece, really.  And yet…it’s such overkill as a response.  But people overkill all the time.

So…I don’t know.  If automated responses have gotten this good, we’re doomed.  Why would Skynet destroy us physically if it can control our communications?

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About wormme

I've accepted that all of you are socially superior to me. But no pretending that any of you are rational.
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2 Responses to I can’t tell the difference between spam and free verse.

  1. SeanB says:

    My method is for whole chickens. Place the whole frozen lump , still in the sealed bag, into the microwave in a shallow bowl. Full power for 20 minutes, or until the bag pops. Leave for 10 minutes to cool down, then remove the bag and season. Cut in half or make a flattie and put over low coals until done.

    Turkey suffers from being too big to get in the microwave though…… At work I have pots big enough to take an ostrich whole though.

  2. Xpat says:

    You could supplement your superb Lovecraftian turkey tales with turkey haiku. As sage Worme said:

    “Man, whoever froze
    these two turkeys meant business.
    I suspect Ice-9

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